Saturday, December 29, 2007

"Recommendations for Personality Type Five" vs. My Actual Intentions for 2008

This is another post in a series on New Year's resolutions, based on the "Recommendations" chapter of Understanding the Enneagram. Previous posts on this topic can be found here and here.
This time, I'm gonna do things a little differently. First, I'm just gonna tell you more or less exactly what Riso and Hudson said, and then I'll comment in red on whether or not said advice has in any way factored into my resolution-making. Ya dig? Good; let's go.


1. "Learn to notice when your thinking and speculating take you out of the immediacy of your experience... Stay connected with your physicality."I'll get back to this one later.
2. "Make an effort to learn to calm down in a healthy way, without drugs or alcohol." I'm actually pretty good on this one. I will admit that, back in September, after I had spent the whole day nearly drowning (see picture above) and watching Mary Beth and other friends nearly drown, I did drink half a beer to calm down, but no, I haven't reached rock bottom yet, so 2008 will not be the year of total sobriety. "Exercising or using biofeedback techniques will help channel some of your tremendous nervous energy." Other than the aforementioned near-drowning, I have few memories of 2007 that do not involve me sitting on my butt, so exercise is a great suggestion. Getting back into the gym is tops on my resolution list. Also, I did not know what "biofeedback techniques" were, but apparently, they are this. "Meditation, jogging, yoga, and dancing are especially helpful for your type." Another hit! Meditating more regularly is on my list!
3. "When you are caught in your fixation, a sense of perspective can be missing, and with it the ability to make accurate assessments. At such a time, it can be helpful to get the advice of someone you trust while you are gaining perspective on your situation." Whaddaya say, Mary Beth, are you up for talking me off of more ledges in the coming year? If so, I'm down for asking for some advice.
4. "Notice when you are getting intensely involved in projects that do not necessarily support your self-esteem, confidence, or life situation. It is possible to follow many different fascinating subjects, games, and pastimes, but they can become huge distractions from what you know you really need to do." So true. Most of my resolutions this year are about setting aside time for the kinds of things -- timely bill-paying, occasional house-cleaning, grocery shopping -- that I often neglect because they're just so darn boring compared to, say, blogging about the Enneagram. Of course, I could delegate some of those tasks... say, is there anyone out there who would like to help me get my stuff together and, um, connect me with my physicality (see item 1 on this list)? If so, call me, but understand that, as a 5 in good standing, I am obligated to not pick up the phone.
5. "It is important to remember that having conflicts with others is not unusual and that the healthy thing is to work them out rather than reject attachments with people by withdrawing into isolation." Fine. I will pick up the phone. Sometimes. Maybe.
6. "Try to be more cooperative with people and less of a loner."
7. "Some Fives tend to make others feel ill at ease. Because they are so intensely involved in what interests them and find their own ideas so fascinating, they tend to forget the social niceties that help others be comfortable with them. If this applies to you, remember that your very brilliance may be intimidating to many."
8. "Even if other people are not as intelligent, this does not automatically mean that they are stupid or their ideas are worthless. Try to be more accepting of their intellectual limitations without being cynical or harsh in your judgements."
9. "If others begin to avoid you or react to you antagonistically, consider the possibility that you -- rather than they -- have begun the antagonisms. Examine yourself to discover what you may have contributed to your interpersonal conflicts."
10. "Think of ways to develop your compassion for others, to understand what they are going through from their point of view.... Do not use only your head; use more of your heart." I actually think I've been doing a pretty good job with items 6 - 10 lately, so I intend to sort of plateau out and rest on my laurels in the coming year; I hope this will not bite me in the ass.


4 comments:

Mary Beth said...

Cindi: check your list. You have left out number 6.

Cindi said...

I didn't leave it out. Blogger was just being weird and printed #6 (and only #6) black on black. Anyway, it's fixed now.

Mary Beth said...

Blogger can be weird. Have you noticed how it looks when I do those long quotations? Maybe you can help me figure out how to do that correctly.

Cindi said...

Yeah; it inserts a bunch of extra spacing. Anytime I copy from another source, I always have to edit the spacing. Sometimes, I'll publich it to the blog, see how it looks, and then return, edit, and republish. Show me next time; maybe we can figure it out together.